deprivation (it's not what you think)

 Today has been one of those days where all of my burdens on myself have taken turns in waves surfacing and creating havoc in my brain.  Right now I'm trying to just practice putting into words to exert all of the thoughts inside my head.  

The thing is, I'd like to see how descriptive I can be in the least amount of words and to do that requires complete uninterrupted focus which isn't easy to come by. There's a continuous battle I'm in with myself and the path I've chosen.  I'm bitter, angry, lonely, and sad.  (I'm sure my emotions are running wild seeing as I've not gotten laid in months).  I'm going to be 40 this year and the saying "you don't use it you lose it" is a motto for so many aspects of life.  This one being, my lady parts.  The sad part is that I'm always horny. So my attitude problem and the chaos erupting through my brain is actually withdrawal from dick and I'm starting to develop dick deprivation.  

Who knows, but anyway today has been a little tough for me mentally. Sometimes I just feel like I can't get out of my own way or can't tell whether I'm coming or going. 


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