It's a DuBarr Thing

 Lately I just don't feel good about myself.  I've got this phobia with using the phone and it messes with important aspects of my life.  For instance, years could pass by and each day I put off until the next calling the oral surgeon or primary care physician.  Whenever it comes to making any appointment it takes multiple breathing techniques to actually pick up and dial a number. Then more deep breaths waiting for the response.  There are many things I need to make a priority as well as initiative to get them done.  To do that I have to convince myself that it's just a phone call and it's not like the person on the other end can instantly get to me.  "It's just a phone call" I keep repeating to myself.  Sometimes to ensure I don't stutter too much or outright say something out of sorts I'll write down exactly what I want to say and how I'd respond then I'd just repeat as needed throughout my call. Having confidence and courage are 2 major...

  Are historians naturally depressed because they live in the past? I am told that I live in the past and what's funny is that since it's been pointed out, I see it.  Often I think back to what was and just how different things have become.  Time has gone by and part of me says there is so much more to accomplish though there is a small part of me that see's myself as I will always be.  I'm unsure why that is; lack of courage I presume.   I'd like to have more courage.  Right now I'm super insecure because of my tooth or lack there of.  It's very embarrassing.  When a customer comes in I like to smile and say hello though when I do their eyes go right to my mouth.  If I smile a little bit, like a grin, barely showing my teeth it's not noticeable.  Then I smile naturally and I'm all teeth and that rotten spot is smack dab in the middle.  I'm going to have a root canal done.  I've never had one and am very nervous.  Ple...

  If there happens to be another life for me, I'd like to be born with the same knowledge I leave this life with. After living there's a few things I'd like to be aware of for my next life.   Granted I get one, I'd like to know how important it is to form a good reputation for yourself. Word of mouth is the most credible way to spread information. When you're good to people; when you act accordingly, treating people with respect even in their weakest moments, allows you to get the upmost respect. If I could I'd like to realize how important it is to do good in school so that I apply myself from the start. Can I know that true love wants to know you spiritually and intellectually before ever knowing you intimately and sexually?  In my next life I want to know more about my health, my mind, and my body. Reading body language will help me drastically. From the beginning I'll respect my mom, I'll show her more love.  I'll realize that my trauma's nee...

Courage- the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear; bravery. When I look back in my life, there has been so many times that I've had to show courage and I flaunted it like an owner.  It's difficult to find the right words to explain how courage works in me though the one way I can think of it is "fight or flight".  When it boils down to something that is festering in my brain or a feeling I can't shake, then I have to do or say something about it. It literally lifts what feels like a heavy weight off from my shoulders. There's been many times that I've been extremely confident. My confidence tends to lean more towards the work that I do and/or when I'm comfortable. The issue with that is, uncomfortable situations are inevitable. It's part of life. The only way I will ever get beyond that uncomfortable state is by having the courage to make it through. Standing tall and proud, even throu...