Model Your Expectations

Has anyone else ever sat down and thought to themselves "shit, I'm mean"?  I've wondered before if I had it all wrong though today more than ever I am really questioning myself.  The reason being is I have terrible OCD and things have to go a certain way.  It's one of the main reasons I don't go anywhere or visit many people. I'm unsure how to push those feelings of control aside for the people that just need safety from me.  I'll never hurt any child physically though unintentionally I believe I frighten them because I'm stern or my beliefs are so intense that I have to have things done a certain way which is normally never the kids way.  Tonight as I sit here on the edge of my bed I want to know how I can be different?  I want to know how I can maintain a level of being stern but not so obsessive that I scare a kid? When something is done under the strategy of someone else's brain I want to be able to accept their way, fully accept their process and the individual that they are.  I think I could be telling myself these things.  I should be telling myself that I am no one to judge or try to change anyone. The world is so diverse and there are millions of types of people out there just trying to live each day the same as any other person. Every one of us comes with different experiences which is another valid justification for the fact that we can't expect anyone to know anything that they weren't taught. We can do our best to teach them though and the best way to teach someone else is mostly by modeling such behavior ourselves. If we can't justify what we preach by our own actions then we have no right preaching them. 


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